By Constance Latimore
This is the day the Lord has made; We will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24
As with other life experiences, I did not have to journey alone. My friends and family insisted on walking with me throughout this process. I’d planned to go to my egg retrieval appointment alone, perhaps minimizing the momentousness of this stop on my journey. I shared my plans with close friends and family, but didn’t want anyone to inconvenience themselves for my benefit.
I did not have to go alone. I was blessed with 4 women from my circle who travel(ed) to Dallas, TX to walk with me. They are women I met during various seasons of my life.
One is my youngest sister. She and I have been supportive of each other’s path for as long as I can remember. While we have chosen very different positions on maternity, we remain respectful and encourage each other to do what makes us happy.
Another is my best friend. Since grade school, she’s been my fierce protector. Before we were friends, she assumed the role. We eventually became friends and she has remained by my side for every milestone I’ve achieved.
I met another in college. She and I are sorority sisters. We’ve seen each other through the best and worst of times. Speaking of the best of times, she’s currently pregnant with her first child and I couldn’t be any happier for her and her husband.
The remaining friend was a coworker, turned roommate, turned friend. She accompanied me in the waiting room during my retrieval procedure. Due to visitation restrictions, only one person could wait with me. She shared that my journey is one that she was unaware of as an option for her own fertility journey. This is the reason why I am intentional about sharing and exposing other women to the egg freezing option.
Hopefully, you will understand why maintaining relationships can be so critical to your life’s journey. I was blessed to have these women present during one of the proudest days of my life. From start to finish, I was blessed with the emotional and physical support.
I needed physical support upon arrival at the hospital. I could barely walk into the lobby and up to the doctor's office. I would later learn that the size and volume of my eggs had taken a toll on my body. I felt weak, tired and uncomfortable in a way I had not anticipated. However, the excitement of what was to come strengthened me.
My egg retrieval procedure was completed in approximately 45 minutes and I remained there for another hour to ensure my vitals returned to their normal state.
From an emotional perspective, my support group and I prayed for 30 (plus) viable eggs; however, God saw fit to bless me with more. A total of 47 eggs were retrieved and 32 of those were viable and frozen. They will remain stored offsite in liquid nitrogen tanks until I decide to thaw them in the future.
We couldn’t contain our excitement and amazement at the answered prayers. God proved faithful (this feels like a word might be missing) to me and I don’t take it lightly. I am well aware of the blessing in the number and quality of eggs retrieved from my body.
My heart aches for those who may not have had my success.
I empathize with the women I know, as well as, those I don’t know. I pray God will intervene in their unique situation to provide exactly what is needed as only He can.
Empathy is one of the reasons I don’t allow myself to get offended easily by the questions or responses received when sharing my experience. This option is new to some and I’m willing to be transparent enough to remove the veil from a sometimes taboo topic. There have been several different responses to my decision to retrieve and freeze my eggs. Some were excited and happy for me. Others were puzzled as to why I’d take what may be considered drastic measures to prepare for a child. My hope is that my journey will be used, at minimum, to educate others and present options to fertility.
I didn’t know I knew anyone personally, who had experienced this route to fertility. There are several benefits to having someone with previous experience answer questions, provide more insight. I’d like to be that someone for another young, black woman.
“It’s about women helping women and women doing things together and supporting each other.” Diana Burch
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